XXIX. Universals (first posted 2-3-13)

It is universally acknowledged that you will fall in love just days before moving away from a place
And that a long-distance relationship begun on such a foundation never works.
And that one can never discount one’s own departure from the possible causes of the relationship.
And that the sex better be good.
And that putting a tree in a verse will salvage it.
And that romance isn’t dead, but it isn’t alive either.
And that you saw Django, but didn’t really like it.
And that you think Catherine Bigelow is overrated.
And that roaches cause a profound sense of dis-ease in a way that no other non-poisonous insect can really manage.
And that the sex better be good.
And that beer bottles scattered around an apartment are never a turn-on. Never.
And that the Internet increases procrastination.
And that a dog barking in the distance in a verse creates the effect of solitude and loneliness.
And that prostitutes are virtuous in nineteenth-century novels.
And that working at a bar, you see a lot of people.
And that you still do not cover the variety of human experience.
And that the sex better be good.
And that old people regard death in a different way from young people.
And that, barring accident, you’ve still got a long way to go, my friend. You’ve still got a long way to go.

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